Sex workers explain why they don’t want their clients to ‘please’ them

#8
An interesting conundrum. Personally, I find it a big turn on if it 'appears' that I am giving pleasure as well as receiving it, but can also totally understand that I am one of many 'visitors' and it's a job, and you cannot be expected to click with most.
I vere towards Sub/Dom sessions (me the Dom side). It is almost essential for me that my sub is getting off on it too, for me to enjoy my part. I am not looking to (excuse the terrible analaogy) 'use a bit of meat', but a two way give and take session.
Whilst I totally get that 'it's just a job', and in reality most of the time, my end of the bargain is just to pay up, and not be an obnoxious client, and the wg end is to try and please me (and also not be an obnoxious provider), I come away feeling less than satisfied if that is all there is to it.
It is an ideal that is hard to achieve, but when I pay for sex, I want as near to a real experience as possible, and that includes us both getting some pleasure (other than money) from it. Pipe dream?
Having said that, if it can't be two-way, PLEASE don't fake it that obviously. Thats the worst!
 
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#10
I always like to start a meeting with RO. A previous reg told me on our first meeting that this never did anything for her.
I appreciated her honesty, also that that there was never any fan moans.

That hasn't stopped me however.
 
#11
I think there's some merit to this.
If a guy wants to please me for his enjoyment, crack on, I'm down with that and if I enjoy, I enjoy, if I don't, i don't. I don't fake orgasms but I almost always enjoy some if not all aspects of the intimate action. Whether or not I orgasm isn't a given. And my body language shows it. It's not a knock on anyone's skill or lack of my enjoyment that stops me from climaxing at times, I'm just not a machine and will not fake it if it's not happening lol.

But when they want to do it and expect you to get off, well, that's a different story or if they think it's expected of them but it's really not their thing.

But as to the "why sex workers don't want you to please them" what rubbish as it's too broad of a sweep.
 
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#12
An interesting conundrum. Personally, I find it a big turn on if it 'appears' that I am giving pleasure as well as receiving it, but can also totally understand that I am one of many 'visitors' and it's a job, and you cannot be expected to click with most.
I vere towards Sub/Dom sessions (me the Dom side). It is almost essential for me that my sub is getting off on it too, for me to enjoy my part. I am not looking to (excuse the terrible analaogy) 'use a bit of meat', but a two way give and take session.
Whilst I totally get that 'it's just a job', and in reality most of the time, my end of the bargain is just to pay up, and not be an obnoxious client, and the wg end is to try and please me (and also not be an obnoxious provider), I come away feeling less than satisfied if that is all there is to it.
It is an ideal that is hard to achieve, but when I pay for sex, I want as near to a real experience as possible, and that includes us both getting some pleasure (other than money) from it. Pipe dream?
Having said that, if it can't be two-way, PLEASE don't fake it that obviously. Thats the worst!
I suppose if we are demanding that they are satisfied or we cannot have enjoyed ourselves, then faking is an understandable get out at times :unknown:
 
#14
I would imagine 5-15 punters a day may try the capabilities of a sp... 1/2 a day mebbe different story..?..:unknown:
If I've had a play before in my free time then it ain't happening again for the rest of the day. Wouldn't matter if I saw 1 or 100 (gawds the thought) it still wouldn't happen lol.

I envy those who can have multiple pops a day, female or male lol. But I simply can't.

So it really does depend on the individual.

That's not to say I won't enjoy. Or as the article said, that I wouldn't want to enjoy lol.
 
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#15
I would imagine 5-15 punters a day may try the capabilities of a sp... 1/2 a day mebbe different story..?..:unknown:
I do have one “hobbyist” regular who literally works one day every month or two. She will contact her three or four regulars to make sure at least a couple can see her before booking a hotel for a Friday afternoon through to Saturday morning, if she still has space she will switch her AW green light on.

She makes no secret of the fact that she does it for her enjoyment as well as for her clients’ (don’t get me wrong - she does care that her clients have a good time). She has a full-time job and the money goes towards holidays. I usually have early Saturday morning reserved after which she will pack her bags and check-out. I am in no doubt that she “enjoys” her job, but then her situation is hardly that of your typical SP.
 
#16
The article in the link starts with 'You wouldn't go to a salon and give your hairdresser a trim'. This is similar to my analogy on a recent thread when we were discussing the same subject, it was pooh poohed by some...
I wouldn't hire a plumber to fix a leaking tape, then do the job myself why they sit and watch.
I give RO...but that's because I love licking pussy...and bumholes. Surely if a wg senses a client needs her to show enjoyment...she's likely to fake it just to keep him happy. Where does that leave those punters for whom this is important, and why is it important anyway. Obviously I don't want a wg to hate her time with me...but the feeling that she's cool with what she's doing is all I need to see her again.
 
#17
The article in the link starts with 'You wouldn't go to a salon and give your hairdresser a trim'. This is similar to my analogy on a recent thread when we were discussing the same subject, it was pooh poohed by some...


I give RO...but that's because I love licking pussy...and bumholes. Surely if a wg senses a client needs her to show enjoyment...she's likely to fake it just to keep him happy. Where does that leave those punters for whom this is important, and why is it important anyway. Obviously I don't want a wg to hate her time with me...but the feeling that she's cool with what she's doing is all I need to see her again.
That's because it's a silly analogy, just like the one in the article.
 
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#20
If I've had a play before in my free time then it ain't happening again for the rest of the day. Wouldn't matter if I saw 1 or 100 (gawds the thought) it still wouldn't happen lol.

I envy those who can have multiple pops a day, female or male lol. But I simply can't.

So it really does depend on the individual.

That's not to say I won't enjoy. Or as the article said, that I wouldn't want to enjoy lol.
punters that have six pops in the hour IMO are sometimes truthful but I canny see that they enjoy.......I met a lassie who said up front I pop once a day and the previous guy did it soooo.....?
 
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#21
This has the appearance of the typical anti-prostitution / sex work media bias. They'll either demean or sensationalise it (the latter usually when there's a "celebrity" involved).

So the depiction here is of a distanced and perfunctory sex act offered by a sex worker and received by a paying customer. It's all very clinical and there's no need for public unease because no-one is really enjoying it and it's not a threat. The hairdresser analogy is also daft, as although the customer may not offer the hairdresser a trim, there are various other forms of reciprocity (conversation, humour, mutual respect, etc) occurring to make the interaction mutually enjoyable as well as the financial - service interaction. I'd venture that many a hairdresser has emerged feeling more positive following a good, funny, supportive, etc discussion with a customer.

There have been numerous threads here relating to unrealistic expectations, egos, delusions, etc, and yet many of us (SSs and SPs) have shared experiences of mutually enjoyable meetings. The description above by @Jessica Bee seems realistic to me, i.e. under the right conditions, at the right time, in the right mood, with the right approach, etc there MAY be mutual enjoyment and satisfaction. As a SS I'd want to optimise that possibility but in a natural, spontaneous and non-pressurising way, and to recognise when it's not happening and respond accordingly.
 
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#22
theres a lot of cynicism about this topic I can understand folk who canny understand why they would waste their time an money bothering wi the sp an some who call out the perceived or correct bragging........but for me if I enjoy something an Im paying then I will partake an if I find on occasion that a sp actually enjoys the engagement and its fun then its a better experience for me.......Ive never liked conners I would rather a lassie say...it isny happening for me today than pretend.........just practical nae ego..........?
 
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#23
Hm. I agree with others that the article as a whole is generalising a bit too much, but I do also agree with what some of the women quoted are saying.

My primary reason for escorting is to earn a living. It suits me because I'm not squeamish, I'm good at sex and I genuinely enjoy pleasing other people. I did not get into it seeking my own sexual satisfaction from an array of men who I am not attracted to and don't fancy. That might be quite blunt and harsh but it's the truth.
If my own sexual satisfaction happens naturally in a booking because we mesh well, then great. But it's not something that should be expected or chased after in a booking - the pressure of that is too much and makes my job harder to do. If a client genuinely wants me to enjoy myself, he won't make it all about me but just let it flow without forcing it. I'm very happy receiving oral, for example, but hate feeling under pressure to orgasm from it. If a client wants to spend the entire booking licking me out, then he absolutely can! So long as he doesn't have any expectations about my level of enjoyment/satisfaction.
But every SP will have her own thoughts on this and we won't all feel the same way.
 
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#24
Hm. I agree with others that the article as a whole is generalising a bit too much, but I do also agree with what some of the women quoted are saying.

My primary reason for escorting is to earn a living. It suits me because I'm not squeamish, I'm good at sex and I genuinely enjoy pleasing other people. I did not get into it seeking my own sexual satisfaction from an array of men who I am not attracted to and don't fancy. That might be quite blunt and harsh but it's the truth.
If my own sexual satisfaction happens naturally in a booking because we mesh well, then great. But it's not something that should be expected or chased after in a booking - the pressure of that is too much and makes my job harder to do. If a client genuinely wants me to enjoy myself, he won't make it all about me but just let it flow without forcing it. I'm very happy receiving oral, for example, but hate feeling under pressure to orgasm from it. If a client wants to spend the entire booking licking me out, then he absolutely can! So long as he doesn't have any expectations about my level of enjoyment/satisfaction.
But every SP will have her own thoughts on this and we won't all feel the same way.
Indeed, neither did I. It's still great to be paid to lie back and receive oral.
:D
 
#25
Hm. I agree with others that the article as a whole is generalising a bit too much, but I do also agree with what some of the women quoted are saying.

My primary reason for escorting is to earn a living. It suits me because I'm not squeamish, I'm good at sex and I genuinely enjoy pleasing other people. I did not get into it seeking my own sexual satisfaction from an array of men who I am not attracted to and don't fancy. That might be quite blunt and harsh but it's the truth.
If my own sexual satisfaction happens naturally in a booking because we mesh well, then great. But it's not something that should be expected or chased after in a booking - the pressure of that is too much and makes my job harder to do. If a client genuinely wants me to enjoy myself, he won't make it all about me but just let it flow without forcing it. I'm very happy receiving oral, for example, but hate feeling under pressure to orgasm from it. If a client wants to spend the entire booking licking me out, then he absolutely can! So long as he doesn't have any expectations about my level of enjoyment/satisfaction.
But every SP will have her own thoughts on this and we won't all feel the same way.
With you on this.
You know, if it had been titled "sex workers want you to know you don't need to please them" and followed up with *and expecting them to enjoy is cliche and here's why* I could *possibly* get behind it lol.
 
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#26
The article in the link starts with 'You wouldn't go to a salon and give your hairdresser a trim'. This is similar to my analogy on a recent thread when we were discussing the same subject, it was pooh poohed by some...


I give RO...but that's because I love licking pussy...and bumholes. Surely if a wg senses a client needs her to show enjoyment...she's likely to fake it just to keep him happy. Where does that leave those punters for whom this is important, and why is it important anyway. Obviously I don't want a wg to hate her time with me...but the feeling that she's cool with what she's doing is all I need to see her again.
I agree with this
 
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#27
theres a lot of cynicism about this topic I can understand folk who canny understand why they would waste their time an money bothering wi the sp an some who call out the perceived or correct bragging........but for me if I enjoy something an Im paying then I will partake an if I find on occasion that a sp actually enjoys the engagement and its fun then its a better experience for me.......Ive never liked conners I would rather a lassie say...it isny happening for me today than pretend.........just practical nae ego..........?
I remember all your 1-1 draw and 2-1 home win posts all I can say to them is
:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
 
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#28
With you on this.
You know, if it had been titled "sex workers want you to know you don't need to please them" and followed up with *and expecting them to enjoy is cliche and here's why* I could *possibly* get behind it lol.
Yeah the article title is problematic and the whole thing misses the nuances of the subject. As @Picti noted, it does seem to be intentionally coming at it from a very specific angle.
 
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#34
Because I somehow doubt I'll be able to give anyone a screaming orgasm :lol: I like to allow time for masturbation/vibrators, partly because I like to watch it, but also so the SP can get some pleasure from the meet.
 
#36
This is a little of a crass article in my opinion, granted I didn't get all the way through it because it kind of offended me a little. Firstly I dont like the analogy to a hairdresser I think that's just stupid and secondly I dont like the term "use".

Sorry I just dont think I'm "using" anybody, this term is normally associated with abusers or drug addicts or its referring to the SP as a object not a person. I tried to read on but it lost me from there.
You didn't miss anything.
 
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#39
theres a lot of cynicism about this topic I can understand folk who canny understand why they would waste their time an money bothering wi the sp an some who call out the perceived or correct bragging........but for me if I enjoy something an Im paying then I will partake an if I find on occasion that a sp actually enjoys the engagement and its fun then its a better experience for me.......Ive never liked conners I would rather a lassie say...it isny happening for me today than pretend.........just practical nae ego..........?
I personally do not go to a punt with a goal to make the SP orgasm. I go to have fun with a like minded individual, if we both have a good time, thats fine by me.

I've had sessions where a second pop hasn't happened but had a great time and been back. Sometimes the second pop happens and that time in Hamburg (don't know if I've said the story before) a third pop:cool:

I find some of the acting a bit amusing particularly in the "cum now" punts but I think a man familiar with the female anatomy should be able to tell pretty easily if he's pushing the right buttons. I do however applaud the actresses for some of the acting I've witnessed.
 
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#40
I personally do not go to a punt with a goal to make the SP orgasm. I go to have fun with a like minded individual, if we both have a good time, thats fine by me.

I've had sessions where a second pop hasn't happened but had a great time and been back. Sometimes the second pop happens and that time in Hamburg (don't know if I've said the story before) a third pop:cool:

I find some of the acting a bit amusing particularly in the "cum now" punts but I think a man familiar with the female anatomy should be able to tell pretty easily if he's pushing the right buttons. I do however applaud the actresses for some of the acting I've witnessed.
Exact... the trick for me is to find a fun experience to balance my serious life...?
 
#43
Because I somehow doubt I'll be able to give anyone a screaming orgasm :lol: I like to allow time for masturbation/vibrators, partly because I like to watch it, but also so the SP can get some pleasure from the meet.
Herein lays the crux of the issue. Not everyone will appreciate that. Expecting her to want to get some enjoyment is an expectation too far.
If she enjoys, great; don't expect it.
 
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#50
The article is too simplistic, each situation is often very different. One person asking personal questions can be very different to the next.

However being confronted with 'Tell me your real name' on a first, second whatever booking can be very daunting.

Physical pleasure I do accept, but it's not fair to then base success on that.
 
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#51
The article is too simplistic, each situation is often very different. One person asking personal questions can be very different to the next.

However being confronted with 'Tell me your real name' on a first, second whatever booking can be very daunting.

Physical pleasure I do accept, but it's not fair to then base success on that.
I just think the session should be fun for both parties.......I can look beyond attraction if the session is fun and passionate.......I canny abide sessions where the torture of the lassie needing to put in an hours worth when she canny be bothered and would rather be doing something else......in my mind they should get out of the trade......:unknown:

personal questions I think are a red card for both.........?
 
#52
I just think the session should be fun for both parties.......I can look beyond attraction if the session is fun and passionate.......I canny abide sessions where the torture of the lassie needing to put in an hours worth when she canny be bothered and would rather be doing something else......in my mind they should get out of the trade......:unknown:

personal questions I think are a red card for both.........?
Why "should" it?
There are times I don't enjoy (though with a smile on my face). That doesn't necessarily mean the booking was lacking. I don't walk away thinking oh well that wasn't a good booking because I didn't get anything from it. There's many reasons I may not enjoy from time to time though it has very little impact on how I conduct a service or the level of enjoyment experienced by said client. Edit, unless it's an out an out cunt, then obviously it affects my service performance as it's usually kick out time if they've become a cunt.

Though I do understand what you mean, I don't like being served by a sulky shop assistant. But that doesn't mean I think they should smile when I ask them wherever x, y or z is, it would just be nice of they did. I don't expect them to. I don't think "they shouldn't work here" just because I happened upon them in a less than cheerful mindset.
 
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#53
I just think the session should be fun for both parties.......I can look beyond attraction if the session is fun and passionate.......I canny abide sessions where the torture of the lassie needing to put in an hours worth when she canny be bothered and would rather be doing something else......in my mind they should get out of the trade......:unknown:

personal questions I think are a red card for both.........?
1-1, lovely polish princess.
 
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#55
Why "should" it?
There are times I don't enjoy (though with a smile on my face). That doesn't necessarily mean the booking was lacking. I don't walk away thinking oh well that wasn't a good booking because I didn't get anything from it. There's many reasons I may not enjoy from time to time though it has very little impact on how I conduct a service or the level of enjoyment experienced by said client. Edit, unless it's an out an out cunt, then obviously it affects my service performance as it's usually kick out time if they've become a cunt.

Though I do understand what you mean, I don't like being served by a sulky shop assistant. But that doesn't mean I think they should smile when I ask them wherever x, y or z is, it would just be nice of they did. I don't expect them to. I don't think "they shouldn't work here" just because I happened upon them in a less than cheerful mindset.
If its a chore delivered through false smiles an groans then it is noticeable by me an I would rather save my money... just the way I look at it. The sp doesny have to be climaxed to death or even once :lol:.. Im no talking about that but I like a fun session an fun takes two or I might as well call for mrs handy..?
 
#93
If I even seen fifteen clients in a week my fanny would dry up.
ha........one lassie in particular told me that she normally sees 8-10 a day seven days a week an when she goes to germany its circa 15 a day....:scare:.she also said that her pussy had not let her down in eight years.....:lol:.......another a retired reg told me that when she first started in a parlour it was 14 hrs a day 15-20 punters normal busy days more.......:crazy:
 
#95
ha........one lassie in particular told me that she normally sees 8-10 a day seven days a week an when she goes to germany its circa 15 a day....:scare:.she also said that her pussy had not let her down in eight years.....:lol:.......another a retired reg told me that when she first started in a parlour it was 14 hrs a day 15-20 punters normal busy days more.......:crazy:
How many towels did she get through a day? :bomb:
 
#98
probably...only really interested in counting the money?......this pimp operation must be fairly large as they run a dozen venues .........but their timekeeping/comms is crap........but this is in the past as I canny imagine its worth her coming back to the uk just now.........or frankly ever.......still lots of new ones will arrive from far corners of puntopia following dec 31st...?
 
#99
ha........one lassie in particular told me that she normally sees 8-10 a day seven days a week an when she goes to germany its circa 15 a day....:scare:.she also said that her pussy had not let her down in eight years.....:lol:.......another a retired reg told me that when she first started in a parlour it was 14 hrs a day 15-20 punters normal busy days more.......:crazy:
Not for me. Not ever.
 
probably...only really interested in counting the money?......this pimp operation must be fairly large as they run a dozen venues .........but their timekeeping/comms is crap........but this is in the past as I canny imagine its worth her coming back to the uk just now.........or frankly ever.......still lots of new ones will arrive from far corners of puntopia following dec 31st...?
Depends on how dystopia pans out I guess :unknown:
 
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