Have you ever farted during a meet ?

Messages
2,944
#1
As I say above, have you ever farted during a meet? Or worse.

All this talking about anal on another thread reminded me about an experience of my own. I had taken a bit of a pounding (vaginally), we switched to him going down on me and as I came I did the most humongous fanny fart right in his face. I burst out with laughter, problem was that the more I laughed the more It kept on coming. It sounded like a cartoon car sputtering to a stop. I was mortified that he might think it was an actual fart so let him know that that was indeed fanny bubbles and that he created them. He kept a straight face and stayed hard to continue but I was sniggering the whole way through.

I also had an incident where somebody left a very big poop stain on my white bed sheets as he slid off to get dressed. I dared the girl I was duoing with to do a sniff test and she agreed on the basis that I would take the load in the next appointment in which a facial had been requested.

All good fun.
 
Messages
429
#3
I've never trumped during a meet, that I can remember! Though I have had a couple of ladies fanny fart while with me, like you say usually after a good pounding!

I was seeing a civvy reguarly a few years ago and she was so devastated when she did a fanny fart that it was game over - she was distraught and just wanted to roll over and go to sleep! I told her so many times that I wasn't bothered but no luck haha!

It was pretty funny though, I can't lie!
 
Messages
360
#4
As I say above, have you ever farted during a meet? Or worse.

All this talking about anal on another thread reminded me about an experience of my own. I had taken a bit of a pounding (vaginally), we switched to him going down on me and as I came I did the most humongous fanny fart right in his face. I burst out with laughter, problem was that the more I laughed the more It kept on coming. It sounded like a cartoon car sputtering to a stop. I was mortified that he might think it was an actual fart so let him know that that was indeed fanny bubbles and that he created them. He kept a straight face and stayed hard to continue but I was sniggering the whole way through.

I also had an incident where somebody left a very big poop stain on my white bed sheets as he slid off to get dressed. I dared the girl I was duoing with to do a sniff test and she agreed on the basis that I would take the load in the next appointment in which a facial had been requested.

All good fun.
Look as I keep saying to Chloe, I have repeatedly apologised so can we please just move on? :D

I have only once experienced the joy of the sustained queef, I don't think I was going particularly hard or fast (no surprise for anyone who's met me), probably just the angle, or my tiny penis allowing lots of air in around it.

I found it interesting/funny rather than off-putting but the lady in question didn't acknowledge it at all, which I thought was strange - perhaps she was embarrassed by it?
 
Messages
1,245
#6
As I say above, have you ever farted during a meet? Or worse.

All this talking about anal on another thread reminded me about an experience of my own. I had taken a bit of a pounding (vaginally), we switched to him going down on me and as I came I did the most humongous fanny fart right in his face. I burst out with laughter, problem was that the more I laughed the more It kept on coming. It sounded like a cartoon car sputtering to a stop. I was mortified that he might think it was an actual fart so let him know that that was indeed fanny bubbles and that he created them. He kept a straight face and stayed hard to continue but I was sniggering the whole way through.

I also had an incident where somebody left a very big poop stain on my white bed sheets as he slid off to get dressed. I dared the girl I was duoing with to do a sniff test and she agreed on the basis that I would take the load in the next appointment in which a facial had been requested.

All good fun.
Yes ! :blush:.
A "strong but silent one" slipped out of me whilst a very "active lady' was giving me a BJ, a few years ago.
The conversation then went along the lines of "Hey, did you just fart ?" - "Sorry, yes I did" - "Oh, thank heavens for that, I was worried it might have been me"
Hysterical laughter on both sides for a while, then back to business.
Now that's what I personally consider to be a fun lady with the right attitude :angelgirl:

Another time in Sri Lanka, I had a good night in the casino and finished up with local "Gold Digger" in my hotel room.
Great sex, slightly marred by the local cuisine having affected my digestive system to the extent that I left a small brown stain on the sheets while "on the vinegar strokes" :(
 
Messages
858
#7
As I say above, have you ever farted during a meet? Or worse.

All this talking about anal on another thread reminded me about an experience of my own. I had taken a bit of a pounding (vaginally), we switched to him going down on me and as I came I did the most humongous fanny fart right in his face. I burst out with laughter, problem was that the more I laughed the more It kept on coming. It sounded like a cartoon car sputtering to a stop. I was mortified that he might think it was an actual fart so let him know that that was indeed fanny bubbles and that he created them. He kept a straight face and stayed hard to continue but I was sniggering the whole way through.

I also had an incident where somebody left a very big poop stain on my white bed sheets as he slid off to get dressed. I dared the girl I was duoing with to do a sniff test and she agreed on the basis that I would take the load in the next appointment in which a facial had been requested.

All good fun.
"I burst out with laughter, problem was that the more I laughed the more It kept on coming. It sounded like a cartoon car sputtering to a stop. "

Absolute classic Hannah!!!:D
I laughed that much I managed to forget about the horn you gave me in an earlier post:cool:
 
#9
"I burst out with laughter, problem was that the more I laughed the more It kept on coming. It sounded like a cartoon car sputtering to a stop. "

You silver tongued charmer Hannah:D
 
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4,968
#10
I fanny fart quite a lot for some strange reason, it does give me the giggles :D

But yes I actually farted on someone when he threw my legs over his shoulders rather quickly and out of the blue, it was loud and I was mortified but he didn't mention it! :D
 
Messages
720
#11
Never. I have great control and even if I really need to I have trained myself to hold it until I am alone. It's something my Mother taught me. A lady never passes wind when in company and I would get sent to my room as a kid if I did so I learned self control to the point I can now hold it all day if I have to
 
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858
#14
Never. I have great control and even if I really need to I have trained myself to hold it until I am alone. It's something my Mother taught me. A lady never passes wind when in company and I would get sent to my room as a kid if I did so I learned self control to the point I can now hold it all day if I have to
I've got this image in my head of you now Dani - getting home and letting rip and flying around your lounge like a released balloon:D
 
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9,468
#15
You got to be from Wolverhampton to ask a question like this. :yahoo:Love that city.:kissgirl:

Closest I got was a burp mid snog and quickly turned away, Sorry I said, better out than in ........
 
Messages
1,245
#17
I fanny fart quite a lot for some strange reason, it does give me the giggles :D

But yes I actually farted on someone when he threw my legs over his shoulders rather quickly and out of the blue, it was loud and I was mortified but he didn't mention it! :D
Because you're tight, Holly ? :)
I still thinks it's best to mention farts ( fanny or botty ), admit them, and have a good giggle about them, if possible :D
Only being human, innit ?
 
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4,968
#19
Because you're tight, Holly ? :)
I still thinks it's best to mention farts ( fanny or botty ), admit them, and have a good giggle about them, if possible :D
Only being human, innit ?
I think it's more because I have a tendency to get pretty wet. And it's always in doggy. I have one client that springs to mind who kept withdrawing fully then ramming it back in, there was no need for the noise coming from my vagina afterwards, it was like a one man band! :lol:
 
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858
#20
I think it's more because I have a tendency to get pretty wet. And it's always in doggy. I have one client that springs to mind who kept withdrawing fully then ramming it back in, there was no need for the noise coming from my vagina afterwards, it was like a one man band! :lol:
I'm quite partial to listening to some Glen Miller :lol:
 
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1,245
#21
I think it's more because I have a tendency to get pretty wet. And it's always in doggy. I have one client that springs to mind who kept withdrawing fully then ramming it back in, there was no need for the noise coming from my vagina afterwards, it was like a one man band! :lol:
Interesting ;)
Only ever happened for me in "mish", but with her heels up around my ears ( is that really "mish" or is there another name for that ?:lol:)
 
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J

jonboy

Guest
#26
I fanny fart quite a lot for some strange reason, it does give me the giggles :D

But yes I actually farted on someone when he threw my legs over his shoulders rather quickly and out of the blue, it was loud and I was mortified but he didn't mention it! :D
I'd have fallen about laughing, probably fallen off the bed and hit my head too
 
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249
#28
The ladies often make a pussy farting noise, it's natural when there is lube. Some more so than others, who cares?
Spoons and mish with legs up seems to make it happen, quite funny really, but I never pay any real attention.
 
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9,468
#29
Has anyone ever seen that movie 'American Beauty' where Annette Bening is lying on the bed and the dude is fucking her. He yells 'I am the King' and Annette yells back 'Fuck me your Majesty'. At that point her legs are so wide apart you could attach her heels to each bedpost. The exact opposite of heels up round your ears. Yet they are both missionary. I think we should create a new name for two such disparate positions.

I have always fantasised about saying 'I am the king' and getting that response....... Deluded maybe :crazy:
 
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360
#30
I think it's more because I have a tendency to get pretty wet. And it's always in doggy. I have one client that springs to mind who kept withdrawing fully then ramming it back in, there was no need for the noise coming from my vagina afterwards, it was like a one man band! :lol:
Just need the cymbals and the bass drum in time with each thrust. :D
 
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360
#34
"I burst out with laughter, problem was that the more I laughed the more It kept on coming. It sounded like a cartoon car sputtering to a stop. "

Absolute classic Hannah!!!:D
I laughed that much I managed to forget about the horn you gave me in an earlier post:cool:
Would have been better if steam came out of your ears and the doors fell off. :lol:
 
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33,282
#37
Do not judge me but I've got a gruesome story to tell

Picked up a civvy in my uni days and we were going at it hammer and tongs and I felt some rumbling, thought with all the noise we were making she would not hear it. So I let it out, sadly it was a wet fart

Went limp and she asked what happened and I was so ashamed. She laughed, asked me to take a dump and a shower. Went in and expected her to leave.

To be fair to her, she stayed and sorted me out but I got called shit stain all through our short relationship
 
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858
#38
I got stomach cramps at the start of my first overnight- told her I wasn't feeling to great and went for a walk - it was more of a speed walk to the pub toilets a couple of mins away where the entire world contents fell out of my arse!!!

Went back and explained what had happened told me I was silly to scarper of to the pub. Told me to shower and to make sure I didn't shit the bed :D

Thankfully no melted mars bars were found in the bed the next day:cool:
 
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1,245
#39
I got stomach cramps at the start of my first overnight- told her I wasn't feeling to great and went for a walk - it was more of a speed walk to the pub toilets a couple of mins away where the entire world contents fell out of my arse!!!

Went back and explained what had happened told me I was silly to scarper of to the pub. Told me to shower and to make sure I didn't shit the bed :D

Thankfully no melted mars bars were found in the bed the next day:cool:
Both me and my fave have had slightly upset tummies during our numerous overnights together ( me more than her ).
We both simply admitted the problems when they happened, and it never caused a problem because we were open and honest with each other, and went gently with the poorly one.
A good extractor fan in the loo is good too :D
Thankfully no mars bars, IVAM :hi:
 
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15,502
#40
Interesting ;)
Only ever happened for me in "mish", but with her heels up around my ears ( is that really "mish" or is there another name for that ?:lol:)
Take your pick from this lot...
http://www.sexinfo101.com/facetofacepositions1.shtml

Great site, I learned all three of my bestest positions from on there :D

And to keep on topic no I haven't ever farted (or worse) during a punt because I've never even thought about it, but now I'm a little worried for next time...Thanks Hannah!! :lol:
 
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1,245
#41
Take your pick from this lot...
http://www.sexinfo101.com/facetofacepositions1.shtml

Great site, I learned all three of my bestest positions from on there :D

And to keep on topic no I haven't ever farted (or worse) during a punt because I've never even thought about it, but now I'm a little worried for next time...Thanks Hannah!! :lol:
You just haven't "lived" AR :D !
Don't worry about next time as long as you can both have a giggle about it ?
 
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47
#42
I fanny fart quite a lot for some strange reason, it does give me the giggles :D

But yes I actually farted on someone when he threw my legs over his shoulders rather quickly and out of the blue, it was loud and I was mortified but he didn't mention it! :D
Shame your not in London, I like fanny farts, nothing better than a vibrating fanny round my knob :thumbsup:
 
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11,164
#48
Look as I keep saying to Chloe, I have repeatedly apologised so can we please just move on? :D

I have only once experienced the joy of the sustained queef, I don't think I was going particularly hard or fast (no surprise for anyone who's met me), probably just the angle, or my tiny penis allowing lots of air in around it.

I found it interesting/funny rather than off-putting but the lady in question didn't acknowledge it at all, which I thought was strange - perhaps she was embarrassed by it?
Hello, chloe signing in..you quoted Hannah lol
 
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11,164
#49
Never. I have great control and even if I really need to I have trained myself to hold it until I am alone. It's something my Mother taught me. A lady never passes wind when in company and I would get sent to my room as a kid if I did so I learned self control to the point I can now hold it all day if I have to
Our mothers would have got along very well
 
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