First Proper session with a sub

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232
#1
hi all, looking to pick your collective brains... I have my first session with a proper sub booked for today but as this is completely new to me I'm looking for ideas of simple scenes/role play for the complete amateur, she is aware I have very little experience and happy to give pointers but going in forearmed would be helpful.
 
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#3
Dive dive dive!

Seriously don't you think you should have had this conversation already?

At this late stage I'd suggest you just have a proper conversation at the start of the session so she can explain, guide and set parameters before you get into the role play itself. Maybe start with one that she really enjoys so she's comfortable.
You are probably right on that one, but was only arranged quite last minute!
 
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#5
Thanks Raddy, we have spoken about what I like/she likes but not so much on limits, really it's a bit of a taster session if you will to dip my toe, to try another new experience.
 
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#6
To be fair what the other guys have said is true. By now this should all be sorted even if booked last night. A phone call to discuss this should have happened by now as not only does she need to be aware of what you are looking for you need to know her limits as well. Dom/sub bookings are great but can become rather dangerous when no discussions are held before hand. She has no clue if you want to smack her arse or asphyxiate her so is leaving herself wide open here for those who like to hurt women. You have no clue how hard she likes it or how easily she bruises etc you both haven't even set up a safe word. It's no good really think up one on the spot as one or both of you could forget it hence it should be talked about in advance so the word has time to embed so as soon as you hear it you stop
 
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#8
IMHO if you're asking these questions you're not really ready for a proper Dom/sub session. Why don't you talk to the girl and say you just fancy a bit of spanking, hair pulling etc. Something a bit lighter to get you going and to build up some trust with each other. I started like this with a girl and progressed to whips, choking, tying her up, face fucking etc. But it took quite a few visits before we got to that stage. Don't do anything that will compromise you or the girl. :hi:
 
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#9
A couple of years back I had my first experience with a Sub
She asked me to call and discuss as I pointed out it was my first experience
We were on the phone for a good 10 minutes she explained the whole concept of sub/dom relationship, how is should behave as a Dom, the concept of her counting spanks an requesting more, what she was prepared to have done to her and the traffic light system.
On the meet we spent another 5 minutes going over it again
I suggest you contact your would be sub and talk things through
 
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#11
hi all, looking to pick your collective brains... I have my first session with a proper sub booked for today but as this is completely new to me I'm looking for ideas of simple scenes/role play for the complete amateur, she is aware I have very little experience and happy to give pointers but going in forearmed would be helpful.
Perhaps as the first time ask her to run the show from the bottom to give you an idea, if she is happy with that anyway, give pointers as you go along sort of thing
 
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#12
Obviously I have been a little naive about this.

A couple of years back I had my first experience with a Sub
She asked me to call and discuss as I pointed out it was my first experience
We were on the phone for a good 10 minutes she explained the whole concept of sub/dom relationship, how is should behave as a Dom, the concept of her counting spanks an requesting more, what she was prepared to have done to her and the traffic light system.
On the meet we spent another 5 minutes going over it again
I suggest you contact your would be sub and talk things through
Although this is what i had in mind, nothing full on just a bit more out of my comfort zone, I'm not looking for anything extreme.. But hey, I'm going to enjoy it whatever happens
 
#14
I don't know what dom/sub is all about I like abit hard DT and facial etc. but I don't know what a guy would get out of choking a burd or tying her up to fuck her
 
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#15
Ok, I think I've not got across very well what I was originally asking. We have established this will be new to me, it's more about pushing my boundaries than her's and she is aware of this and is happy to lead/point out as i'd like it as a taster into a world that intrigues me and not experienced before....
 
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#17
I have in the past subscribed to a couple of the channels on kink dot com. Plenty of D/S ideas there, and at the start of each video a briefing session which confirms limits, safe words etc. Too late for Dingo to do any research I suppose, but a quick search on the usual free vid sites may result in the odd cut down version of one of their vids which might be useful?
 
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#19
Ok, I think I've not got across very well what I was originally asking. We have established this will be new to me, it's more about pushing my boundaries than her's and she is aware of this and is happy to lead/point out as i'd like it as a taster into a world that intrigues me and not experienced before....
If you are completely new to it then it is understandable that you wouldn't necessarily think to go through it in great detail beforehand. If I 'm honest I probably would have been the same. I wouldn't know where to start :unknown: It sounds like you are not looking for a full on sub/dom session anyway but more of a normal session with the chance to talk about/try a few specific things. It would also be a good first meet to see if you click so that if you do she will have an idea of where you might want to take it in the future and you will have a better idea of her boundaries. Whatever happens I hope it goes well for you and her :thumbsup: If you are able to talk to her beforehand though so much the better.
 
B

Butter wouldn't melt

Guest
#22
IMHO if you're asking these questions you're not really ready for a proper Dom/sub session. Why don't you talk to the girl and say you just fancy a bit of spanking, hair pulling etc. Something a bit lighter to get you going and to build up some trust with each other. I started like this with a girl and progressed to whips, choking, tying her up, face fucking etc. But it took quite a few visits before we got to that stage. Don't do anything that will compromise you or the girl. :hi:
With any Doms that I meet for the first time it has always been a natural progression until trust has been built, personally I don't generally allow tying up etc on a first meet unless I am at my incall and know I am not alone. Definitely wouldn't allow if I was attending some ones home or hotel.
 
#23
That's a completely redundant comment. If we were all the same, what a boring, boring, boring world this would be.
redundant comment??? Hows that?? im more or less asking what people get out of it as I don't know what sub/dom is all about.
Sorry if I don't understand why a guy wants choke a burd then tie her up and fuck her.
Yes we are all different that why I posted on here
 
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#24
Come on play nice guys.... Buck, its is generally the girls who like to be submissive and the guys just want to try it and see what the buzz is about...obviously if you are a complete dom, you will be controlling a sub anyway and then both parties are fulfilled.
If like me you want to experience a submissive after setting the rules first it is a complete turn on.

Says me, who cannot quite mange to dominate someone, but perhaps I need to travel to another part of the country to experience one of the sub girls on here who have got me thinking maybe just maybe:P:P

Raddy
 
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#25
I'm crap as a Dom - I'm way too impatient - I like to get down to the action when I with a girl

I do however thoroughly enjoy giving a gorgeous girl's arse a canny spanking - handful of hair in my left while my right reddens her buttocks :thumbsup:
 
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#26
redundant comment??? Hows that?? im more or less asking what people get out of it as I don't know what sub/dom is all about.
Sorry if I don't understand why a guy wants choke a burd then tie her up and fuck her.
Yes we are all different that why I posted on here
You made a statement. You didn't ask a question. A question would have ilicited a very different response.
I'm playing nice now Raddy.
 
#28
Come play nice guys.... Buck, its is generally the girls who like to be submissive

Raddy
Then maybe im just being selfish but when
You made a statement. You didn't ask a question. A question would have ilicited a very different response.
I'm playing nice now Raddy.
listen I don't need to answer to you or anyone. I can come on here and say what I want and you wont stop me if you don't like what I say then block me
 
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#29
I have not yet had chance to read the full thread so apologies if I am repeating.

Make sure you have read her profile / website info and got everything you can from that.If she has any reviews on UKP they will hopefully give you some ideas of what is acceptable in a booking .If not reviews of others sub girls may be of some help but exact services and likes will differ from girl to girl so a quick chat at the start will be essential.
 
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#30
I'm well into the idea of dom/sub but from the cerebral side rather than the pain/restraint side of things, never tried it though but looking to very soon.
I cum with my brain, not my cock (if that makes any sense) so its no surprise really.
 
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